Party Like a Pilgrim

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It’s been like a frat house at the Kiddush Club over the last several weeks. What, with the recently concluded holidays and their associated revelry, you’d think we’d want to throttle down for a bit. Hardly!

There’s nothing we’re more grateful for than the chance to make a l’chaim for the Pilgrims and their astute sense of direction. Of course, if you drove your ship onto a rock, we’d drink to that, too.

Americans nowadays have few things that bring us together more than Thanksgiving. Black or yellow, white or brown — it’s all red, white and blue on that Thursday, baby.

So, whether you’re going to be priming the pump all day with football and baked salami, or it’s a wee bit more elegant, we’ve combed through the vault for some thematic drinks to make merry. Some are simple, and others call for some slight effort. Either way, they are KC-tested and drunkard-approved.

Pumpkin Martini
If Thanksgiving was a pie, pumpkin be thy flavor. Thus, for the swanksters in the audience, we’ve mined a martini recipe that makes you look shwanky and tastes like hanky panky.

You’ll need: Skyy Pumpkin Infused Vodka, Cointreau and ice. Swirl Cointreau in a martini glass, then dump out. Shake vodka and ice to chill and strain into martini glass rimmed with pumpkin pie spice.

Maple Leaf Martini
Blasphemy, you charge. Maple leaf? Isn’t that a Canadian thing? Sure, the maple leaf is on the Canadian flag but, ahem, we have maple trees, too. Ever hear of a little place called Vermont?

Gather ’round: 1 oz. Stoli Orange vodka, ½ oz. Stoli Vanilla vodka, ½ oz. Cointreau, a splash of orange juice and a tad of cream. Throw the hooch in a shaker with ice and shake to chill. Add the OJ and pour into a martini glass. Garnish with a berry and place said tad in the center. Sip.

Pilgrim’s Punch
We gotta give mad props for our boys with da funky hats. Hella! But hold up a minute, home-slice. Before you get all crazy, know this drink takes some effort.

Hook it up: 1 cup of dried cranberries, 1 cup of dried apricots, 1 bottle grappa (Domenis makes a kosher grappa). Wait for it … In a large, air-tight container, combine grappa with dried cranberries and dried apricots and let sit for two weeks at room temperature. Yep, two weeks. Hella!

Mama’s Apple Pie
Oh, mama. Only you can make a great cocktail seem so wholesome yet have the potential to wreck those who don’t give mama her due. The active ingredient, friends, is a staple of the college crowd.

Role call: 1 gallon apple juice, ½ gallon fresh apple cider, 3-4 cinnamon sticks, 1 liter Everclear alcohol. Put the juice, cider and cinnamon sticks into a pan and let simmer on the stove for about two hours (we said simmer!). Turn off heat, pour in 1 liter of Everclear to the batch and pour into punch cups. Tastes exactly like apple pie.  Warning: It’ll mess you up.

Wild Apple Turkey
For those menfolk who need not be bothered with complications but still want to be at the party, we have the perfect drink. It’s easy (only two ingredients); it’s manly (no spice sticks or tads of cream); and it has an unquestionably manly base — bourbon.

Ten-hut: 2 parts apple cider to 1 part bourbon. Scale for the appropriate crowd. At ease, soldier.

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